About My Last Post

I am laying here trying to think of something humorous but I am not feeling it.I am having a bad day. Bad Day. I hate that term bad day. I have way to many bad days. It seems like I am always saying I can't I am having a bad day.I am sick of bad days, the term bad day and and feeling bad. I have to go I am laying here typing with my finger nail because my fingers are hypersensitive and even with my arms supported my back hurts bad.Bad day.I'm fine thanks.

What to Do

I have been thinking what I want to do with this blog. I was thinking I would use it to vent about all my pain which I may still do because I don't like talking about it so maybe I will write about it but I think I will try for humorous, ironic or stupid. I think I will try for the first two but will probably end up with the third one.(hint: its stupid). I appreciate the comments and those of us in pain know the only real relief is to not dwell on the pain or it will get worse so we need to occupy our minds even if for just a short time. I know there are alot of people alot worse off than me and I wish them all the best and I should probably feel lucky that I can still walk,feel lucky I am not paralyzed and I did not die so I should feel lucky. Right? F*^% THAT. I DO NOT FEEL LUCKY I FEEL SCREWED. Whoa were did that come from anyway I will try for humorous , ironic or just stupid because if we dwell on our pain it will consume us. Don't let that happen and try to escape if just for a little while. I'm fine. Thanks

Current Page.

Mind games

I was just wondering if all people with chronic pain lose their minds on occasion. I have noticed that when the pain starts getting more intense my mind will sometimes go blank or I just can't think straight. Besides the frustration of it all I can't explain why my brain does not work right when the pain gets high (not that it worked right before). The right side of my upper back and head feel like they are in a vise right now which is a little better than when it feels like being stabbed from the back all the way to the chest. By the way I'm fine. Thanks

I Don't Like to Meet People

I don't like to meet new people. I better explain that it is not the people I don't like it's just to hard to try to move and act like a normal person. I don't know why I but I feel like I have to hide my pain from everyone including family and friends. It is just embarrassing to not be the strong person I used to be and to need help from people so I try to act like everything is O.K. That seems to be my standard answer when asked how are you doing I just say I'm fine. So I need to go to the store while trying to walk normal to keep people from staring or worse asking me what happened or what's wrong. I hate to talk about it because I feel like I am being judged and people think maybe the pain is not that bad or just have the doctor do this or that (never thought of that ). I know most people have good intentions but I don't want to stand and talk about it that just hurts more,and by the way I'm fine. Thanks

Pain Exhibit

Here is a link to the Pain Exhibit a site with art from chronic pain sufferers about chronic pain.
http://painexhibit.com/ there are some art works sent in from all over. Rob

Another Day in Paradise

I could barely get up and walk but at least the pain is high. ha. The meds are finally kicking in so I can move a little bit. Everyday is just another day in paridise. Rob

Back in Pain

Chronic pain is a thief. it breaks into your body and robs you blind.
With lightning fingers, it can take away your livelihood, your marriage, your friends, your favorite pastimes and big chunks of your personality. Left unapprehended, it will steal your days and your nights until the world has collapsed into a cramped cell of suffering.

This is from the cover story of TIME MAGAZINE and I have lived it along with many others. Here is a link to the story- http://www.time.com/time/covers/1101050228/story.html I hope it helps. Rob